Fourth of July.

In Congress, July 4, 1776. "The unanimous declaration of the 13 united States of America..." and so began momentous events that changed the trajectory of history.

In a tux, July 4, more than 200 years later. "Be though consecrated unto me..." and so began momentous events that have changed the trajectory of my personal history. Technically, those events began exactly 2 years earlier when I asked the lovely woman that would choose to marry me, "Do you want a hot dog or hamburger?" Such are the advantages of working the grill at a singles picnic.

I can't imagine the feeling of the patriots: some combination of fear, exhilaration, doubt and pride. They had just dismissed the divinity of the crown. Right or wrong, there was no going back. Their world was never going to be the same.

Standing with my almost wife I too had a full range of emotions. There was more joy and excitement than anything else. For me as for the founding fathers, there was no going back. My world was never going to be the same.

As it turns out, the signatories of the Declaration of Independence were right. They chose to challenge the World Order and created the democracy all other countries covet. The path has had more than a few "construction delays" but 235 years later still the USA is still the greatest country in the world. The Declaration of Independence has made the world a better place.

Even though I've been married less than 235 years, my July 4th declaration has also stood up over time. Just like the US, my family has grown over time and my family has also had our share of setbacks. In spite of all the challenges, we celebrate another year of being together. Jefferson & Co. weren't trying to change the course of history, they were trying to improve their little corner of the world. The same goes for me: I was just trying to improve my life. I too, have been successful. Who know's what the next 235 years will bring?

HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY TO YOU. HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO ME.

Weddings: "I Do" For The Couple, Think Twice For All Others.

June and weddings will always be intertwined. June is indeed the month with the most weddings. Almost 11% of the annual weddings in the US occur in June. The June bride is such an iconic concept there is even a June Bride movie. So apparently June is a good month for a bride at a wedding. What about the rest of us?

There are 178 guests at a US wedding on average. Deducting the bride, groom and officiant leaves 175 people.  Some of these 175 have strong connections with the couple (parents, attendants, relatives, good friends). Many of these 175 have minimal connections with the couple (business associates, distant relatives, +1 of invitees).  All of these 175 have too much free time with little to do at a wedding.

Of those with strong conections to the couple, some will be asked to give a toast. Others may bring something to enrich the celebration with either meaning or humor. Be it toast or other, everyone will want their addition to be memorable. Most will succeed at making their add-on memorable, many for the wrong reason. Better to be forgotten than remembered for as a fool, jerk or other social misfit. Most of the wedding ceremonies and receptions are now videoed. There will be evidence. Rule of thumb:  If you have to consider the appropriateness of your words or actions, the answer is no. The day is about the BRIDE and groom, don't make it about you.

For those with minimal connections to the wedding couple, act as though you are the designated driver for everyone else at the wedding. Yes, it's boring but you will be happier tomorrow and the rest of your life. Really.

An addendum on the urban/apocryphal wisdom regarding the confluence of alcohol, bridesmaid and taffeta. Adults are responsible for their consumption and no one will blame you for assisting someone out of an overpriced, hideous dress. Remember to be compassionate. Even if she can't remember your name, make sure the rest is worth remembering. Also, if she doesn't remind you of the occasion, reciprocate the kindness.

Go to the wedding and have a great time. It's the beginning of a new life together for the married couple. Make sure people are willing to invite you out in public in the future.